Does True Love Really Exist?

It’s been a while since I posted here. I was on my motorbike (like everyone else in Bali) and I got inspired to write this blog. Does true love really exist? Is there such a thing as your one true love? I think not, at least not exactly. I believe that there are true loves (plural or multiple loves) and that true love is a function of fate (or whatever you may call it: coincidence, destiny, or whatever), decisiveness, and choice.

So: True Love(s) = f  [fate · decisiveness · choice]

I’m going to freely use the word “fate” here to describe the first function in determining true loves. There’s more than one person with whom you have the potential of being in a relationship. It depends on fate which one you meet first. Say you live in Bali. You may live your whole life never knowing that you have a true love waiting for you across the globe in Buenos Aires, who doesn’t speak your language and you’d never meet in your life. The one connection is that he/she is one of your true loves. So, fate allows you to meet your other true love who is more accessible, with whom you can connect more easily and conveniently. Yes, true love is also about convenience. Although the world is getting smaller and distance is getting closer (both physically through the ability to travel and virtually through the ability to connect online), I believe that you shouldn’t have to try to hard for your true love. Especially because you have more than one true loves. It just the matter of which one gets to you first.

But what if you have more than one true loves within a convenient distance from you or basically within reach? Well, this is where the second function, decisiveness, comes into play. You decide to go with one of those potential true loves. I agree with the notion that people who are more decisive are likely to be coupled faster. The conventional wisdom is that more attractive people tend to find their mates easier. I tend to think that people who are more decisive tend to mate faster; it just so happens that a majority of these decisive people are attractive, and thus the conventional wisdom. So if you find one of your true loves, decide to build a relationship with him or her, then you have your ONE true love. For a lot of people, this would be THE one in their entire lifetime. Remember that people can be conditioned or even condition themselves to love. So, as long as there is a potential within a person to be one of your multiple true loves, go with it and learn to build a lasting relationships.

Then, what about people who are with multiple true loves throughout their lives (at different times or even at the same time)? Now that is a function of choice. Once you choose a mate you also have to choose, throughout the relationship, to be with that true love exclusively and not open your heart for another potential true love. This is where some people fail, and thus affairs happen. Choosing to open yourself for another potential true love is the root of relationship problems. Especially since you have multiple true loves in your life. It could just happen you find one of your true loves first, and then while you are with him/her you find another one. It just depends whether your heart is open for that.

So, I believe you have more than one true loves in your life. It depends of fate which one you meet first; it depends on your decisiveness with which one you build a relationship; and it depends on your choice to stay with that one true love or open yourself for your other potential true loves.